rihanna is not a punching bag, chris

26 09 2009

Hm, so I’ve been sluffin on this blog posting business. My beezy yo. I see my cohorts (linked to the right) have also fallen off the blogosphere. wtf gook in korea?! My motivation has been waning and the white man has been tryin to keep me occupied at work, but its all good (from diego to the bay, your city is the bomb if your city making pay, throw up a finger if you feel the same way, dre puttin it down for californ-i-a), I could never abandon my loyal fan base. I know you guys log on (or check that RSS feed if you’re white and educated) to see what me and t-pain gots to say on the daily son. Read on, for a little glimpse into my world recently…


So a few weeks ago I went on a police ride-along with the SPD-souf precinct AKA the ghetto. Yes, the place you keep hearing about on the news: Rainier Valley, MLK Way, the battle zone for the CD thugs vs the Rainier Beach gangbangers. This was tight cuz I was in the front passenger seat for everything. The regular traffic stop, the hostile traffic stops (involving multiple units and madd weaponry), and the high-speed chases (multiple). I was also chillin up there while we booked this middle-aged Vietnamese lady for DUI. Peepz the pics of her recklessness:


We hit up Subway for lunch (at 1 AM), heard stories about the many crazy people out there, hassled some neeg teens loitering in a park after hours, hassled some gangsters, and searched for gun casings from an apparent drive-by. We also visited Mt Baker to tell some rowdy neegs to quiet down their houseparty. I never knew black people could actually live in Mt Baker.

Conclusion: This is definitely an exciting job, and if I weren’t so trigger-happy, I just might be interested. If I ever did become a cop, there would be an extraordinary rise in racially-motivated shootings. Dark people are scary in the dark, so shoot first and ask questions later right?


Now that summer has come and gone, though the weather has stayed sexy for longer than usual, tis time for the ’09 summer highlights recap:

Ben’s Cabin – AYCE oysters and clams is no joke. We did things man-style and cooked everything on a small charcoal grill (gas is for biiiitches). First night it was burgers and sausages paired with a taste from the rockies, ice-cold Coor’s Light. The next day it was a SeaFest of oysters and clams, and the newly created ClamDogs and ClamBurgers. Suffice to say, both creations were a miserable failure.


At night, while completely sober and in pitch black conditions, we made a short hike to the main street. For some reason this was weird to me, yet very memorable. I started the night sleeping on the carpet next to a soccer ball, then I moved to a lounge chair. Somewhere during this time, the mexican decided to completely destroy the toilet and require the services of a plunger for relief. I hope he learned his lesson.

Much props to Ben for coming through real major, Pablo for pushin the honey-wagon whip, and Brian for toning down the gay. Much hate to the flakers who were not in attendence.

Vegas – Bachelor party. 115 degrees. Caesars. Hot black girl. Bottle service. Tao. Subway. Club XS. Ellis Island. Harrah’s buffet. In-N-Out.

I don’t need to say much else, except that this was a fun trip. Oh, and hot black girl from the PCD section of Caesars casino, please come find me. PLEEEASEEE?! You are tremendously bangin and you made me money. Gah, we should just get married. Oh, and yet again I ended up sleeping in a lounge chair for two nights, wtf?

Hm, thought I had more to write about my summer. This is sad. I guess I could include the return of tpain to the lovely confines of the 206, but I have yet to decide if that’s a highlight or a lowlight… OOOOH SNAPz! Anyways, very solid summer, and better than the year before, but its hard to top 2006 or prior.


Review of recent albums (songs in bold are must-listen):

Colbie Caillat – Breakthrough: Very solid album. I wouldn’t say its better than her first, but its definitely easy to listen to the entire album all the way through. She needs to get crackin on some swanky music videos. Notable tracks: Begin Again, You Got Me, Fallin For You, Rainbow, Droplets, I Never Told You, Fearless, Runnin Around, Break Through, It Stops Today, Lucky (even though Jason Mraz is a gay). Bonus album notables: What I Wanted to Say, Don’t Hold Me Down, and Never Let You Go.

Letoya – Lady Love: All her bangers leaked before her album, so you could say I’m disappointed with this. But with a third of her tracks ranging from good to “hmm, tasty”, this is a slightly above average album. She also needs to get crackin on some sexy music videos with her fine ass self. Notable tracks: She Ain’t Got, Lazy, Not Anymore, Good To Me, Regret, I Need A U, Take Away Love, and Don’t Need U.

Jay-Z – BluePrint 3: Holla atcha boy, Young Hov is back. The leaked singles definitely got me excited for this album. And while Jay-Z may no longer be a lyrical mastermind (eh, his style never completely won me over), he still puts out some very tasty songs. Production from kanye and No ID is what really makes this album. Collabo’s with Mr Hudson (a white guy?!), Rihanna (I bet Jay-Z hit this harder than Chris Brown, but without his hands, naw mean?), Young Jeezy (voice so hoarse, his name should be porsche), Drake (this guy is blowing up faster than tomas’ bout with ghonerrea), and the mighty fine Alicia Keys help as well. I’ll put this one slightly below the Black Album, cuz that thang had some anthems (BRUSH YO SHOULDER OFF NIG!) on it. Notable bangers: Run This Town, Empire State of Mind, Real As It Gets, Already Home, Reminder, Young Forever.

Fabolous – Loso’s Way: Eh. This guy’s style is just really starting to turn me off. He’s starting to sound more like Flo Rida to me, and that is NOT a good look, homie. He’s got some nice collabo’s with Lil Wayne and Ne-Yo, but its apparent that Fabo has fallen off. Or maybe my tastes have changed? NEVAR! Notable bangers: Imma Do It (chorus only), Salute, and Makin Love.

Ace Hood – Ruthless: You’re prob like, yo Rdeezy, who the hell is ace hood? Well, besides his catchy slick name, this guy puts out some real gutta music. Gutta with a capitol G. Yeah, so his ryhmes aren’t sophisticated or thought-provoking, but its quite evident from his small vocabulary, this neeg spits from the heart and his beats are real head-knockers. Drums, snares, and bASS in yo face will have your bumpin this album in your car for days. Notable bangers: Born an OG, Champion, Get Money, Loco with the Cake, Love Somebody, and Overtime.

Mariah Carey – Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel: Quick listen through. Not bad. Will go through it more thoroughly in the coming weeks. Funny thing is the 50 jizzilion versions of her song “Obssessed”. Might she be a bit obsessed with that song? See what I did there? Clever word-play no? Yes. Nod your head.


Here’s some old singles that I forgot to post about (no links for anything, cuz I’m way too lazy):

taylor swift – you belong to me, backstreet boys – soldier down, bsb – all in my head, michelle branch – sooner or later, asia cruise – no thanks to you, chris brown – changed man, marie digby – surrender, jojo – forever in my life, beyonce – poison, beyonce – slow love, atozzio – any day, rich girl – lucky you are, ne-yo – easy, flo rida ft ne-yo – be on you, chris brown – hollow, and mario – highway to love

Here are some newer singles that I’ve been boppin my head to more recently:

colby o’donis – talkin bout us, drake – forever, jojo – wrong man for the job, nivea – look back, omarion ft lil wayne – get it in, jordin sparks – colours, jordin sparks – walk the walk, juvenile – gotta get it, juvenile – hands on you, bsb – this is us, young money – money, beyonce – control, lil eddie – perfect time, toni braxton – i hate love, and toni braxton – yesterday

Toni Braxton and the BACKSTREET BOYS are back!!!

Random fact of the moment: Notepad is awesome, no frou frou ass fonts, formatting, and other bs. I use it all day everyday. And if you don’t know, now you know nigga. Then GI Joe said, “And knowing is half the battle.”

Line of the moment: “it may not mean nothing to y’all, but understand nothing was done for me, so i don’t plan on stopping at all, i want this shiz forever man…”

Before I leave for now, I noticed its apparently cool to post videos again, so enjoy this:

Please believe I will incorporate that into my shit-talking vernacular, niggas. CHILD PLEASE…

Link, because this embedding shit is not working: Stewie – Squiggly Line

That is so true, Stewie. I too have a squiggly line in my eye. My doctor called it a floater. Sometimes when I wake up early, I just lay there in bed trying to look at it. But the squiggly line is evasive and always eludes my focus.

Signin out for now, this is my new alter-ego:





2 responses

28 09 2009

lol how did you get involved with the ride-along? Also, you just need to get with a girl of tomas’s skin persuasion and get it out of your system. We all know it’s true, i’m just putting it out there in the open. May I suggest asking sir Jie for some advice on where to look? keke

2 11 2009

lol, hmmm who would reference that movie?? only one individual with that bad of taste in movies other than Aaron…the man whose name is synonymous with crappy old school $0.25 soda from Safeway.

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